Grandparents Day & Parents Day
by killjoykhaleesi
Summary: Grandparents Day & Parents Day at Midtown High, featuring Peter Parker's unimpressed Grandpa Steve and show-off IronDad.
1. Chapter 1

"And remember class, this coming Friday is grandparent's day!" Ms Norris exclaimed, early Monday morning in homeroom. "It will be between break and lunch, so please do invite your grandparents, as it would be lovely to have a big group of them here! Tea, coffee and cakes will be provided, and we would love if your grandparents had any stories to share from their youth! Get on board with this, guys! I know other classes are very excited about it too!"

Ned shot a worried glance at his best friend. Aunt May sometimes came to parent's day, which he knew Peter got embarrassed about, especially when Flash and his friends bullied him. A couple of times, like last year, Aunt May hadn't been able to show up, and everyone has been horrible to Peter. Ned wasn't concerned about Peter's welfare regarding this year's parent's day, which was the following week, because Peter had already told him that he had a plan – whatever that meant Ned wasn't totally sure, but he trusted that Peter would be okay.

Grandparents day, however? Grandparents day was always horrible for Peter, and Ned suspected this year would be too. Peter never had anyone, and everyone teased him for it. Ned knew how tough days like this were for Peter.

"Ask Aunt May for the day off. She won't mind you skipping because of this," Ned whispered.

Peter pursed his lips for a moment as a devious thought crossed his mind. He thought of how funny Mr Stark would find it, and he knew he had to do it – even if he was a little nervous about it. And it _would_ be hilarious...

Peter grinned. "I've got a plan…"

* * *

"Hey, uh, Mr Rogers, sir?" Peter asked timidly, suddenly regretting everything.

Eloquent as ever, Steve turned around to look at the kid, a fond smile brightening his already flawless face.

"Peter! How can I help you, son?" Steve asked, clapping the young man on the shoulder.

Peter blushed. Was he being horrible by doing this? He was. It was just one stupid day; like Ned said, he could just take the day off and it would be fine…

 _But it would be so goddamn funny._

He swallowed, trying to remain calm. "Uh, well, you see…" Peter took a deep breath. "Well we'rehavinggrandparentsdayatschoolandIwaswonderingifyoucouldcome," he rushed.

Steve looked momentarily confused. "Could you repeat that a little slower?" he asked, bewildered, though with a fond smirk. The kid was always like this, excited and timid at the same time. It reminded Steve a bit of himself as kid.

"Uh, family day!" Peter cried, suddenly terrified. "I said family day! At school, I mean, we're having one, a family day."

Steve nodded in approval. "That's good of the school. It creates a good community, having days like that."

"Uh, well, Mr Rogers, I don't wanna be a bother but, um, could you come?"

Steve's eyebrows raised slightly, and his chest puffed. He hadn't felt pride like this in a long time. The kid wanted _him_ to come? He couldn't help but grin.

"Peter, I'm honoured to hear that you think of me as a family! It will be my pleasure to be there for you on family day. Do you want me to ask the rest of the team if they can come?"

"No!" Peter cried quickly. "No, uh…" He faltered, not sure what to say. "I guess I, uh, I don't want them there?" he squeaked.

Steve nodded. "I understand. They're a lot to take in. Tony would make it his goal to embarrass you anyway. I promise I won't do that to you."

Peter smiled sheepishly, feeling guilty again. Steve was being so kind, and he was just trying to be a shit-stirrer. God, what had Tony done to him.

"Thank you, Mr Rogers."

"Pete, son, come on, you know I'm just Steve."

"Yeah. Steve. Sorry— thank you! It's this Friday, is that too soon?"

"Of course not. I'll be there," Steve promised.

* * *

Steve scanned the cafeteria.

There was a lot of grey hair.

 _A lot._

He considered that everyone's parents worked, and only grandparents could come, but he had his doubts.

He was the only non-grandparent there.

Peter's friend was looking at him, wide-eyed. Most of the others were too, but Ned was wheezing on top of that, which really caught Steve's attention. He began to show concern, but Peter told him not to worry. Peter's other friend, MJ, was cackling madly, looking more amused than anyone had ever seen her.

Finally, Steve cracked.

"Peter, exactly what kind of family day is this?" he growled.

"Uh…" Peter swallowed. He had to fess up. He was so dead. "Well maybe, it might, uh, you see Mr Rogers, sir, it's uh… It's grandparent's day!" he confessed.

Steve scowled. "Did Tony put you up to this?"

Peter swallowed.

With another loud laugh, MJ got out her sketchbook. She'd never seen someone in crisis as deeply as Peter was right now. It was the perfect image; it deserved to be recorded.

"Well, Mr Rogers, you see— should I be running right about now?" he asked instead.

Steve raised an eyebrow. "I'd like to see you try, kid."

Peter swallowed again. "Wow. Okay. I'm dead. Uh… Well it's just I never had grandparents, and you're older than most of these guys, and kind of like a grandpa to me, and uh, oh no, I'm making it worse, aren't I?"

Steve's gaze took in the room again, while Peter accepted his own doom. It was a funny idea, he just wished he hadn't followed through with it.

Steve sighed. He finally noticed the tacky "Grandparents Day!" sign tacked to the wall outside the door. If only he'd been more observant. He was older than most of these grandparents. Most of them were born during the war, or just after. He doubted many had seen it – not like he had, anyway. And really, Peter was the kid of the team. He was a son and a brother to all of them.

Steve looked down at the kid from Queens, and saw himself. Steve knew what it was like to be the only one without a parent, or grandparent, there. They didn't do days like this when he was in school, but recitals, plays, graduation… He knew how Peter must have felt time and time again.

He put his hand on the kid's shoulder and gave an encouraging squeeze.

"Well, son, you'd better introduce me."

Peter looked shocked. "Really?" he asked hopefully.

Steve smiled. "You all call me the grandpa anyway. May as well be called it for a worthy reason. Now who's your teacher? This is your homeroom class? Ms Norris is the teacher, right?"

Peter was grinning from ear to ear. He bounded over to Ms Norris to introduce his "Grandpa Steve". Steve laughed and played along.

Steve Rogers had imagined having kids one day. Then he got injected with a super-soldier serum and his life was thrown upside down. Captain America could never have kids — it was too dangerous. None of the Avengers could safely have kids. Danger was everywhere; any kid of theirs would be at risk all the time.

In this moment, more than ever, Steve understood why they'd let the kid in so young. It wasn't just because he had powers. He was the kid they'd all always wanted.

* * *

"Captain America! Wow! Hi!" Ms Norris squeaked.

Steve grinned. "Please, call me Steve. I'm Peter's grandfather."

She looked stunned. "Wow. Okay. Wow," she whispered. She was too shocked to even comprehend his comment.

"Do you wanna meet my friend's grandparents?" Peter asked Steve, now feeling awkward again.

"Of course!" Steve replied brightly. "We'll talk later, Ms Norris."

Ms Norris just squeaked.

Peter dragged Steve over to where MJ and Ned and their grandparents were sitting and _definitely not staring_ at the national hero.

"Hey guys! This is Steve!" Peter introduced.

"Oh my!" Mrs Leeds, Ned's dad's mom, gasped.

"Ha! Well I'll be! Captain America!" Mr Dawes, MJ's mom's dad, cried.

Mrs Dawes smiled at Peter warmly. "Hello there, Peter. How are you, dear?"

"I'm good, thank you, Mrs Dawes! How are you? MJ told me you had knee surgery."

"All recovered now, thank you Peter," she replied fondly. Peter was the favourite of all the parents and grandparents.

"I'm Steve, a pleasure to meet you all. Peter's told me all about you," Steve said, shaking everyone's hand.

"Peter, how did you meet Captain America!" Mr Dawes asked Peter excitedly.

Peter grinned. "He's my grandpa!"

Mrs Dawes chuckled. "Oh, Peter."

"Really?" Mr Dawes asked, wide-eyed. He supposed, the man did have a life before going down under the ice… It wasn't so impossible to believe he could be the boy's grandfather. Or great-grandfather.

"It's the Stark internship!" Ned cried. "Mr Stark introduced them! How cool is my best friend!"

"Very!" Mr Leeds chuckled. "Blimey, it's not every day you meet a national hero!"

Steve chuckled. "I'm not really a hero, sir, just doing my job."

"Oh, but you're such a lovely young man too, saving the day and still coming to be here for Peter. It's so lovely," Mrs Leeds said fondly.

Steve grew amused. "Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm young…"

"He's older than I am, dear," Mr Leeds chuckled.

"Oh, but he's much more handsome!" Mrs Leeds teased. "You must have some good genes, son."

"Or a good doctor," Steve suggested lightly.

"Does it not concern anyone else that we're idolising someone who basically took hardcore steroids so he could go to war?" MJ asked.

Steve smiled kindly. "MJ. A pleasure as always."

"Keeping you on your toes again, old man," she teased. "Read any of my book suggestions yet?"

"I just finished Orwell's _1984_."

"Did it mess you up?" she asked, grinning excitedly.

Steve looked contemplative. "I found it to be very intriguing…"

Steve went to say more, but Pete scoffed.

"I'm sorry, you read _1984_ but didn't watch _Star Wars_!" he cried.

Steve frowned. "You said there are six of those films. One book is much easier. I'll get to _Star Trek_ eventually."

" _Wars_! _Star Wars_! _Stark Trek_ is different! Oh my god you're such a grandpa!"

"Oh no honey, even we've seen _Star Wars_ ," Mrs Dawes teased.

"It's just the iceblock that hasn't," MJ agreed.

"Michelle! My goodness, girl! The cheek!" Mrs Dawes scolded.

"She's fine, keeps me young," Steve teased.

Mrs Dawes chuckled. "If that was the case I'd still be a newborn."

Ms Norris came creeping over, looking a little afraid. No one spoke, waiting for her to finally work up the courage to intervene. Peter pursed his lips. It was weird seeing a teacher acting like a teenager.

"Oh, hi guys, hi Captain America, hi, we have tea and coffee if you'd like?" Ms Norris shrilled.

"Wonderful! We'll come on over!" Mr Dawes said.

Ms Norris smiled kindly before looking at Steve. She then looked panicked and hurried away.

Steve gave Peter a pointed look. "Regretting this yet?"

Peter scowled. "Kind of," he admitted.

Steve laughed and pulled Pete into a playful headlock.

"Mess with the Avengers and you'll lose, son."

"Hey! Aren't I an Avenger?" Peter cried.

"Junior Avenger. You've got a way to go yet."

Peter sighed sadly. "I know."

"Hey Steve!" Mr Dawes called. "How do you like your coffee?"

Steve let go of Peter and strolled over as he spoke. "Black, thank you, sir."

"No sugar? Milk? Nothing?" Mr Dawes asked, looking somewhat horrified.

Steve chuckled shyly. "I grew up in the depression and spent my adulthood at war. Black coffee was all we had."

Mr Dawes chuckled. "Looking at all us oldies, you'd think _we_ were all the ones old enough to see World War Two! Oh, that's funny!" he laughed. He loved a good irony.

Steve pursed his lips. He felt so _old_. How the hell were these old people not old enough to remember the war?

* * *

"Wow! Mr Thompson, law school in the sixties sounds incredible! Everyone, a round of applause for Flash's grandfather! That was gripping, wasn't it!" Ms Norris cried, trying to get some class-involvement.

The class clapped, but were all waiting for something else. Captain America's presence had certainly not been forgotten.

"Now, Peter, is your… person, willing to speak?" Ms Norris asked. She wasn't entirely sure _what_ to call Captain America, but she was fairly sure he wasn't Peter's grandfather… Great-grandfather, maybe, but she thought it was highly unlikely. Surely _Captain America_ wouldn't have a child out of wedlock? It just wasn't the righteous American way!

Peter looked to Steve. He nodded and stood.

"Wonderful!" Ms Norris cried.

Steve went to the front of the class. Everyone was gripping to his every word before he even spoke.

"Hello everyone, I'm Steve, and I'm Peter's grandpa! Not biologically, of course, but Peter is very much family. I guess I'll follow suit and tell everyone a bit about myself. My name is Steve Rogers, I was born on the 4th of July, 1918, over in Brooklyn. I was an art student when the war broke out — I worked as an artist too, to pay for it all... But I know that isn't what you guys want to hear about."

Realising that they were finally about to hear about the war and the beginning of Captain America, the class all grew interested.

"I joined the United States Army in 1942 and was signed up for _Project: Rebirth_. I was injected with a super soldier serum that made me what I am today. I think it goes without saying, that you should _not_ try to create your own serum at home, nor should you be injecting yourselves with experimental drugs," he chuckled. "I fought in the US Army, Captain of the Howling Commandos, until 1944, when I flew my plane into the ocean to prevent bombs being flown into New York. I was pronounced dead. Little did we know, ice and super soldier serum has some funny effects together."

He didn't mention the truth of it all. How he now naturally ages slower than others. How he can withstand high levels of radiation. How he can be frozen in time, if the temperature reached low enough, but can't freeze to death. None of that mattered. The fantasy story was the best one to sell.

"…I woke up in 2011 and became a SHIELD Agent, and am now an Avenger, which I know is what you all _really_ want to know about. Any questions?"

Hands shot up.

"We'll take a few," Ms Norris said. "Ethan?"

"Can you beat Hulk?"

Steve chuckled. "Uh… Yes. Yes I can." He wasn't sure if that was true, but these kids wouldn't know that. Peter gave him a questioning glance, clearly thinking the same thing, but didn't verbalise it. Steve gave him a smug look before turning back to face the class.

"Casey?" Ms Norris asked.

"Is it true you and Iron Man are fighting?"

Steve frowned, looking a little hurt. "No, a disagreement of ours got blown out of proportion by the media. We're still very much friends, and very much a team," he promised.

The media had blown up one of their training exercises to look like a battle, and a PR nightmare had ensued. "Civil War", it was dubbed. It didn't help that Steve and Tony had had an open verbal disagreement before that, over the Sokovia Accords. They'd worked it out, calmly, behind closed doors, but the media were still vultures. They had since made a conscious effort to keep any disagreements or questionable banter behind closed doors, and show only a united front to the world. Being human and openly having fun or having disagreements wasn't an option in their positions.

"Kira, your question?" Ms Norris asked quickly, sensing tension in the room.

"Are you and War Machine friends? He always seems really snooty."

Steve chuckled and nodded. "Rhodey and I are very good friends — military men stick together. His, uh, snootiness, as you put it, is completely a misconception. Everyone thinks he's harsh and antisocial, but that's just years of military training. I know it looks odd from the outside sometimes."

Peter rolled his eyes. The group — Steve, Rhodey, Sam, and Bucky rounding it out — called themselves the Army Brats, and had dozens of inside jokes and codes that they kept from the rest of the team (except for Nat, of course), which annoyed the hell out of Peter. Even when he threatened them with running off and joining the army when he turned eighteen (an empty threat, really, given he was joining the Avengers when he was eighteen anyway), they _still_ wouldn't clue him in on the jokes! Bucky and Sam found it especially amusing. Peter was almost certain that the two of them were convincing the others to play along.

"Deanna?" Ms Norris called upon next.

"Is the Winter Soldier evil?"

Steve grew tense, as he always did when Bucky's captivity and time brainwashed was brought up. His jaw set firm, and he gave the standardized media response. Anything more was a security risk. Moreover, any more detail and Steve was likely to begin screaming at a teenage girl that Bucky was tortured, brainwashed, and _not at all evil_. The media would have a field day if _that_ happened. Best to stick to the standard response.

"The Winter Soldier was brainwashed by HYDRA, but that's been reversed now. He is very much an Avenger," he said curtly.

He looked to Ms Norris, prompting her to quickly choose another student to ask a question. As kind as he was, he was Captain America, and she knew he was someone to be wary of. They'd all seen the frontline footage at some point.

"Ollie?" she asked.

"Do you have the shield with you?" he asked hopefully.

Steve chuckled. "Sadly no, that's back home at the Tower. There's a dispute over who owns it, so I've been trying to only take it when I need to."

"But it's _your_ shield!" Britta cried.

"I believe that too, but certain government agencies believe it's theirs," he said hesitantly. "…And of course, Iron Idiot thinks it's Stark property."

Peter snickered, recalling a few heated arguments involving Tony wanting to replicate the metal for the team's suits, which would have involved chipping off some of the shield. This was before T'Challa joined them as the Black Panther and shared some of Wakanda's vibranium with them. Steve had never looked so horrified. Or so mad.

"It _isn't_ his," Steve added firmly, as the class laughed. "Howard Stark gifted me that shield, so it's _mine_. They can all fight me for it!" he laughed.

"Oh goodness. Okay, how about you, Thom?" a slightly concerned Ms Norris asked, trying to move on before the class got too rowdy or a super-soldier decided to ark up.

"Okay, so is it dumb to ask how I can be an Avenger?"

Steve laughed. "Well I got in thanks to drug experimentation, so I wouldn't recommend you following my path!"

Peter snorted and had to turn away while he laughed.

Some grandparents looked amused, some horrified. Most students were in awe, barely even aware of what he was saying, purely captivated and blessed to be in his presence.

Steve continued without hesitation, listing them off on his fingers. "Tony made a supersuit after being kidnapped by terrorists, so I wouldn't recommend that either. Bucky, drug experimentation again. Hulk, radiation experimentation. Thor's a god, so that's not an option. Nat was a Russian super spy, and I doubt any of you are one of those. Pe—uh— sorry —Spiderman was a radiation accident, again, not possible to copy. Clint…" he trailed off, suddenly stunned. "I have no idea about Clint," Steve realised.

Steve turned to look at Peter. Pete shrugged helplessly.

"I know nothing about the man," Peter confessed. "The other day he told me he owned a farm. Did you know that? A farm! He's literally the biggest mystery I know."

Steve couldn't disagree. "Maybe everyone should figure out his route into the Avengers. So far it's the most feasible."

He didn't bother telling Peter that he knew Clint owned a farm. It would only upset the kid.

"Sam got recruited because you liked to make fun of him and gave him exoskeletal wings," Peter reminded him. "That's doable."

"That's true," Steve chuckled. "Well, let's just day becoming an Avenger is almost impossible, but you can work _with_ the Initiative. It's difficult, but divisions like SHIELD, Stark Industries, the armed forces – they all have teams that work with us. If you can get placed on one of them, then you're a part of the team."

"How about we move on?" Ms Norris suggested, not sure if it was morally right to have her students aspiring to join a legion of sometimes-crazy superhumans. "Flash?"

"Yeah! How the hell do you know Parker? How much did Parker pay you to be here today?" Flash sneered.

Steve frowned, not liking this kid one bit. "I met Peter through his internship with Stark Industries," Steve replied, not totally lying. "He's Tony's protégé, so he spends a lot of time with the team. The only payment I ask for being here today, is Peter's ongoing friendship."

"Come on, be real, Cap," Flash insisted, not buying one word of it. "How much is Parker paying you?"

Steve locked his jaw and did his best to remain calm. He had to tell himself not to try and fight this kid in front of everyone – he must be the one that Peter has spoken about. Now that Steve knew what he looked like, he'd be sure to mention it to the team. He knew Nat sure as hell wanted a few words with the kid they figured was bullying Peter, and he guessed that a few of the others would like a couple of words as well.

"As I said," Steve growled, "Peter works with Tony, and we are good friends. I need no payment for being here, because Peter is a dear friend of mine."

Flash scowled. Peter stepped forward to cut in, and Steve sure as hell wasn't backing down, fully prepared for a fight with this kid.

Ms Norris cleared her throat, now even more concerned than before, that Captain America was going to launch himself over a desk and bash in one of her student's heads with his shield.

"Okay, perhaps just one last question. Ned?" Ms Norris suggested.

"Mr Rogers, what do you think of Spiderman?" Ned asked.

Peter gave his best friend an angry look. Steve's shoulders relaxed at an instant. Even thinking about the kid made him happy. He was just as gone as the rest of the team, when it came to Peter. The kid was precious to all of them.

Steve smirked. "…He's an idiot kid from Queens, but he's got heart. All the Avengers love him — and we love him even more when he isn't pulling stupid pranks on us," Steve said pointedly.

Peter gulped.

"But you like him, right?" Ned asked.

Steve's smirk grew to a soft smile. "Of course I do. He's like a son to me — well," he backtracked, "I'm a little old to be having a kid. At my age, I would have say that he's like a grandson to me."

Peter was grinning from ear to ear for weeks.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter scowled. This was hell, he was sure of it.

"Oh no," Tony laughed, "that isn't even in the top ten of my _Peter Parker Greatest Moments_ List! Top twenty? Maybe. I think the time Pete tried to put out a fire using a tank of gasoline ranks a little higher than the foam incident."

"Who makes their fire extinguisher and gas tanks look the same!" Peter cried.

Tony snorted. "Boring people. Besides, it's Dum-E's job to put out fires."

"Hence the foam incident," Pete muttered.

Tony laughed. "Yeah. Classic!"

"Tell us more!" Cindy begged.

"Noo! Come on guys!" Peter complained.

Tony snickered, getting a real kick out of embarrassing his kid. "Okay. I'll tell you about the first time he met Thor—"

" _NO!_ " Peter cried. " _No!_ Don't you _dare!_ "

Peter quickly realised that even if this was hell, there was also a god, a god which came in the form of Ms Norris's throat clearing.

"Later," Tony whispered to his disciples.

Peter rolled his eyes and prayed for death.

"Okay, guys! Welcome to Parent's Day!" Ms Norris cried. A few people clapped, but not many. "Tea and coffee are available, and we will come together as a group at 12:30 so our parents can share their stories! Everyone, please get to know each other! We at Midtown are so happy to have you all here!"

Chatter quickly ensued. MJ turned to look at Peter, amused.

"What?" he asked hoping that Mr Stark hadn't said anything to her.

"Crisis," she whispered ominously, waving her fingers in front of his face mystically.

He didn't bother denying it. As a group gathered around Tony again, Peter knew that he had to accept that this was the end of him. There was no coming back from this.

* * *

"Peter? Your… guest?" Ms Norris said awkwardly, calling Peter to the front.

"Oh, I'm Peter's dad," Tony said casually.

Ms Norris hesitated for a moment. "Okay…"

Captain America had also said that he was Peter's grandfather, but obviously that wasn't true, it was just a figure of speech. But given Tony Stark's history… Well, she wasn't sure.

Tony grinned and bounded up to the front of the class.

"He's not," Peter muttered, loud enough for Ms Norris and the front row to hear.

Unfortunately, Tony heard too.

He gasped dramatically. "Do you seriously not think I'm your father? Peter, I am _hurt!_ I thought we were past this awkward stage? Come on, kid, you called me dad this morning when I made you breakfast!"

"I was tired and confused," Peter insisted.

"Well what about yesterday when you called me IronDad while we were—"

"Nope."

"You little shit," Tony mumbled. "Whatever. Hello, Midtown High! How are we all today?"

The room rumbled excitedly. None of the other parents had had such a reaction. Peter wanted to crawl into a cave and die. Inviting Steve to Grandparents Day? Hilarious. Tony seeing it as his rightful place to come to Parents Day and making plans with May before Peter even knew about it? Hell.

"Well, I don't think there's any point in introducing myself, right?" Tony asked, looking around the room for confirmation. "Screw it, I'll do it anyway," he concluded, not waiting for anyone to respond. "You know me, Tony Stark, Iron Man, saviour of Earth, genius, billionaire – nearly trillionaire – playboy, philanthropist, Avenger, future-husband of the most beautiful and badass woman to ever exist, father of the stupidest kid on the planet – yes Peter, that's you."

"You're not my real dad!" Peter whinged.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Ugh, children, am I right?" he complained. He got a few agreeing rumbles from the audience.

"Okay! So, everyone has spoken a bit about their job, so I'll do that as well, I suppose. I am the owner and former-CEO of Stark Industries – the current CEO is Pepper Potts, the most fantastic woman in the universe, who as I may have mentioned, is my future wife – I know, how lucky am I, right?"

Peter rolled his eyes. His dad was such a _dork_.

"I am also the head of Research and Development with Stark Industries. My other job, which quite frankly is much cooler, involves flying around a bulletproof metal suit and saving the world."

Ms Norris pursed her lips. As much as she wanted to know about Iron Man, she had to think of the children and their learning. Learning about Stark Industries would be far more beneficial for them. She swallowed her curiosity and asked.

"How about we hear a little about Stark Industries?" she asked. "It's a bit more of a, uh, realistic future employer of these children."

"Of course!" Tony agreed. "So there are a few ways to get into SI. Our reception staff, cooks, cleaners, and admin all either have prior training or agree to have training paid by Stark Industries before they begin – there is of course an interviewing process beforehand, to make sure they're the right fit for the company and not a security risk, which is unfortunately a real possibility these days. What I'm guessing most of you nerdy kids are going for, is what we're known best for: tech, science, and development."

The whole class perked up.

"Okay, so, most of our employees began as an intern, like Peter here."

"I thought high schoolers couldn't be interns!" Flash called out.

Tony frowned, instantly recognising the kid.

"Normally our interns are college students, that is correct," Tony admitted, "though we do make exceptions in special circumstances. Peter is one such special circumstance. Ted, up the back there, he's also working as an intern in our programming department, one night a week after school. And Michelle – where's Michelle? Ah there you are – Michelle is working as an intern also at Stark Industries – largely thanks to Peter's influence, I admit."

"Hell nah, Stark, that was all me," MJ insisted snarkily.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Sometimes I'm tempted to become CEO again purely for the purpose of firing you."

MJ grinned deviously. "You girlfriend says hi, by the way."

"Ugh," Tony grumbled. "I'm ignoring you and getting back to the topic at hand. So yes, we have a _few_ high school interns, but we prefer that you be in college when you come to work for us. The interview process is much similar to other staff, and we get you to work across the board in your first few months, before deciding on an area to specialise in working in. We support you as an intern throughout your degree – these are paid internships by the way – and once you graduate you are more than welcome to apply for permanent positions which, more often than not, we give out. Questions so far?"

"What do they intern in!" Cindy called, eyes-wide and completely jealous.

Tony took it in his stride. "Michelle works in PR and management, I think. I know she's been working in Pepper's team, and Ed's been working in our programming department."

"I'm the Junior Ethics Manager," Michelle said, sounding bored.

"But you still do work in PR and whatnot, right?" Tony asked.

"Yeah, but if you're looking for a title, that's it."

"Okay then. Michelle is the Junior Ethics Manager, and Ted is an Intern Programmer."

"Ned! His name's _Ned!_ " Peter exclaimed.

"That's what I said!" Tony insisted.

Peter groaned. Ned was just so happy that Mr Stark knew who he was, he didn't even care that his name was being said wrong. And honestly? He was used to it by now. Tony never got it right.

"What about Peter?" Flash asked. "What's his internship? Toilet cleaning? He isn't good for much else!"

"Firstly, don't go saying that like it's a bad job to have, I respect all people who work for me," Tony said firmly, "but no, Peter is not actually an intern anymore for Stark Industries."

"Ha! So he _was_ lying about his internship!"

"No, he did used to have one, but he's now a full-time, permanent employee. He works in R&D technically, but really he's an Avengers Tech Liaison."

"He's a _what!_ " Abe squeaked.

"Avengers Tech Liaison," Tony said casually. "He liaises with the team and works on our tech. It's all in the title."

"What do you mean Peter _works on the tech!_ " Casey squeaked.

"Don't?" Peter begged quietly.

Tony ignored him, as usual. "Peter develops tech for the team. I brought some to show today, actually. So recently Peter and I have been working together on a new Iron Man suit, Mark 48, it's basically a prototype but I think you all want to see it, right?"

There were resounding cheers, begging to see the suit.

"Pete?" Tony prompted.

Peter stepped forward, confused. "What do you want me to do?" he asked. The suit was all in Tony's watch, so there was nothing that he could really do or show.

"Explain it to the class," Tony instructed.

Peter sighed. "Oh. Okay, uh, so like Tony said, this is the Mark 48 Iron Man suit," Peter began.

Tony tapped at his watch a little, and slowly, the suit began to form around him. The class were in shocked silence, wide-eyed and slack-jawed.

Peter couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, pretty cool, huh? So we call this bleeding edge technology, because – as you can see – the suit is kind of bleeding over Tony. It's made entirely of vibranium-infused nanites. Vibranium is the same stuff that Captain America's shield is made out of by the way, so this suit _should_ be as strong as Cap's shield."

" _Should be?_ " Tony asked. "It _is_. Don't belittle me, kid."

Peter chuckled and turned to see his IronDad's face slowly being covered by the mask. The suit was still very much a prototype, and they were still working on how to make the bleeding edge tech move faster. At the moment, it wasn't exactly battle-ready.

"…So, uh, like the other suits, this one is also powered by arc-reactor technology, which is still in Tony's chest because he's a stubborn little shit that refuses to trust doctors."

Tony – now Iron Man – tapped the middle of his chest. "This baby's never let me down. Works better than any heart ever could."

Peter rolled his eyes, knowing it was a lie. He wished Tony would get his heart fixed – Dr Cho was more than ready and capable of doing the surgery that would get the shrapnel out of Tony's chest, and it had been scheduled to be done multiple times, but Tony kept refusing, insisting he was fine relying on the arc reactor alone. It stressed Peter, and most of the other Avengers. It especially stressed Pepper, but she was used to his antics more than the others were.

"Anyway, it's got all the mod-cons – missiles, canons, wings, shields... It's run by FRIDAY, Tony's AI. It's totally air-tight, so it can withstand spaceflight and underwater environments. Uh, what else? Oh! The repulsors! Can't forget the repulsors."

Tony flipped the helmet back. "Repulsors are the best bit, kid," Tony agreed. "Questions?" he asked the class.

Hands flew up.

"Okay," Ms Norris cut in, "just a few questions, and if we could avoid too many questions about the Avengers? Listening to the parents here today is supposed to help you figure out how to get into the careers you want."

Many hands went down.

"Right," Ms Norris mumbled.

"Well the kids can dream, can't they?" Tony asked. "Who says no one in the room is an enhanced individual? Kids are good at hiding stuff, you know."

Both Peter and Ms Norris gave him an annoyed look, though both for very different reasons.

"Don't?" Peter quietly begged again.

Tony snorted. "I think by now you know that saying that won't work on me."

"Thom?" Ms Norris asked.

"You never finished telling us about what happened when Peter met Thor for the first time!"

"Serious questions only!" Ms Norris ordered.

Tony snickered. "Let's just say it resulted in Thor screaming like a three-year-old, and Peter crying and ending up in the infirmary."

Peter groaned loudly.

"Ellie? Your question?" Ms Norris sighed. Was it so hard to ask that her students show _some_ interest in their futures?

"Is the new StarkPhone a money grab or is it different to the last one?"

Tony looked almost offended. "Stark Industries has enough money. We don't release things we think you don't need," Tony assured her. "Do you want to see the prototype? It actually is future-employment related, because interns are able to submit ideas to our R&D team, and design and development of the phone is a huge sector of SI," Tony said, mostly for the teacher's benefit.

Ms Norris shrugged, effectively giving up. And honestly, she was curious.

"Peter, phone," Tony ordered.

"Oh my god, we're violating like, twelve NDA's right now! Pepper's going to _murder_ us!" Peter groaned, nonetheless handing over his prototype-model StarkPhone.

"I'll handle it," Tony said vaguely. By handling it, he meant that he wasn't going to let her find out about it.

He held Peter's phone up to the class.

"This is the prototype – not yet finished. Bigger storage options, longer battery life, faster processor, new ease-of-access options for disabled individuals, better speakers, more multitasking options, and all new StarkPhones will come with my personal playlist included for free," Tony explained, treating it like a press-release.

"Ugh," Peter muttered.

"Do you have an issue with my playlist, Peter?" Tony demanded.

Peter screwed his face up. "Not your playlist specifically, just what you do once it starts playing."

Tony rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Anyway, there'll be a big press release when the phone officially drops, and we'll release all the new specs then."

"Any other questions?" Ms Norris asked. "Maybe something along the lines of how to get a job with Stark Industries or what type of work you can do? How Mr Stark got into the industry?"

"Kind of a given," Tony pointed out.

"What made you want to give up weapons tech and work on renewable energy technology?" Cindy asked. "I know you've said Afghanistan in interviews, but wouldn't that make you want to build weapons even more?"

Tony nodded. He didn't enjoy talking too deeply about the reasons. There was too much undealt-with trauma for him to go around discussing Afghanistan, a cave, and a missile with his name literally on it.

"You'd think, but no. Basically, I realised that the world was screwed and that I was one of the people ruining it, so I did something about it. Clean, renewable energy just seemed like something that the world needed – people had already begun working toward it, but they were going about it totally wrong so I spent a couple of nights reading up on it, made my prototypes and here we are. Within five years we hope to have all of New York on our clean-energy grid, and within ten years we're hoping the whole of the United States."

"And the world?" MJ asked bluntly.

Tony smirked. "When the world leaders finally stop taking payouts from unclean energy companies."

MJ smirked as well, and went back to sketching in her notebook.

"Will you ever go back to making weapons, officially?" Flash asked. "Cuz man, you made some _badass_ stuff!"

Tony pursed his lips for a moment, watching as a few of the parents give the kid an annoyed look.

"Stark Industries will never make another weapon, so long as I have any control over the company," Tony swore.

"But don't you make stuff for the Avengers anyway?" Abe asked bluntly.

Tony swallowed, but refused to show any sign of emotion. He kept his face blank, like he would with any reporter.

"I make personalised weapons for people who keep the planet safe; people that I _trust_ , who keep the planet safe. Neither myself, nor Stark Industries, make any money or profit of any kind out of those devices, and they are funded through the Avengers Initiative, which yes, I do technically _personally_ fund. However, the Avengers Initiative is completely separate of Stark Industries."

"But isn't Peter an intern with your company, but liaising with the Avengers? You said so yourself," Cindy reminded him.

"Stark Industries holds a contract to make communications devices for the Avengers," Tony replied smoothly. Really, it was Peter's job to do whatever the hell he wanted, across both boards, but that could hardly be put on paper.

"So he liaises communications technology? Lame," Flash said.

"Better than anything you've ever done," Ned muttered.

"You wanna go, Ned?" Flash snapped.

"Hey! None of that right now!" Ms Norris ordered.

Tony frowned, looking between Ned and Flash for a moment. He decided to drop it for now, but had a few things in mind that he wanted to say to that Flash kid later.

"It's still lame," Flash said.

Tony's cold gaze fixed onto Flash Thompson. "Oh yeah? And what's the closest you've ever been to an Avenger? You ever met one? I'd love to tell you more about what Peter does, but most of it is wrapped up in an airtight NDA," he said firmly.

"I met Spiderman!" Flash said proudly.

Tony laughed. "Spiderman? Cute. He isn't even a real Avenger yet."

"But he works with you!" Flash cried, growing angrier by the minute. Tony Stark or not, how _dare_ someone embarrass him like this!

Tony shrugged casually. "Only sometimes. He's still a kid, we'll let him join the Avengers and work on real missions when he's a bit older."

"If Spiderman isn't a real Avenger than I want you to tell him that he needs to pay for stealing and wrecking my car!"

Tony paused for a minute, processing that comment. Slowly, somewhat shocked and confused, he turned to look at Peter.

"Please tell me Spiderman didn't commit grand theft auto?"

"Spiderman committed grand theft auto," Peter confirmed, terrified that there was a punishment coming. If he lied, it was only going to be worse. "In an Audi R8," he added before he could stop himself.

Tony drew in a breath of horror.

"It's not my fault that Spiderman can't drive!" Peter cried quickly. "Besides he was _very young_ when this happened and it was the night of _homecoming_ and this should _definitely in no way_ stop you from teaching him how to drive. He did just pass his driver's test after all," Peter said hopefully.

Tony gave him a look of disapproval. "You tell _Spiderman_ that he isn't learning to drive in any of my cars if he's going to disrespect a beautiful car like an R8. Oh, and he will be doing some sort of punishment to pay for stealing and crashing a car."

Peter groaned, like a kid that was told he can't have any ice-cream. " _But Tonyyy!_ "

"Nope!" Tony cried. "Don't even try it, kid."

Peter slumped, sulking silently.

"…Wait, Spiderman only _just_ got his license?" Charles asked.

"He's a slow learner," Tony said quickly. "Anyway, moving on. Are there any other questions? Questions that don't involve Spiderman?"

There was a confused silence as everyone desperately tried to come up with a question.

"Can we ask about Peter?" Casey asked hesitantly.

Tony looked to Peter for a moment. "Well, technically I guess I didn't specify not to ask about him," Tony mused. Secret identities were too confusing, sometimes he just couldn't understand why Peter didn't reveal himself.

"Cool! So uh, my cousin interns at Stark Industries and she says she's never seen you in person, yet you're so close with a high schooler that you come to his _Parents Day?_ Just curious about that…"

"Valid," Tony agreed. "I took a special interest in Peter, given his young age. I didn't believe he could be who he was at first, but I was wrong. Peter's the smartest kid I know – he's way smarter than I ever was at fifteen."

Peter blushed furiously.

"We began working closely, I got to know him and his aunt, and I can honestly say that I would be proud if he were my son. He may as well be."

"So he's not some secret love child?"

"No. Surprisingly, I don't actually have any of those floating around," Tony said proudly.

"That we know of," Peter mumbled.

"Watch it," Tony warned.

Peter gave him a challenging look. Tony scowled at him before turning back to the class.

"Peter Parker is like a son to me. So much so, that Pepper and I have named him the heir to Stark Industries."

There was a pause, and then chaos erupted. Peter wanted to yell at Tony for revealing something that big, but one look at Flash's shocked, outraged face stopped him. He stood there, looking smug, as his classmates screamed. Tony came to stand by his side.

"Feels good being a Stark, doesn't it?" Tony said, watching the room with Peter.

Peter grinned. "Not bad," he agreed. "…Will Pepper be mad that you just told my class about this?"

Tony chuckled and wrapped his arm around Peter's shoulders. "Being on the receiving end of Pepper Potts' anger is part of being a Stark, kid… We _both_ think of you as our son, you know?"

Peter blushed. But he wore a proud grin for weeks.


End file.
